Overdue

I should probably include a picture with this post. Like one of my massive belly. But I don't want to scare anyone. And I would have to use the panorama setting.
So.... baby's due date has come and gone. A little depressing. Trying trying trying to remember that these are just ESTIMATIONS, and could be up to 2 weeks off.  And more importantly - that we trust in the Lord's timing and that He will make sure she comes at the right time for *her*. Not for me. The right time for me was last week. Or maybe last month. I've felt very DONE with this pregnancy for quite awhile now. In fact, I can easily say it's felt like my longest pregnancy. The other two seemed to go by much faster.
We're pretty ready for this little girl. There are a few projects I'm wanting to get done around the house before she comes... but I can't imagine that will ever change no matter how much longer she takes.
The nighttime plan:  I've got 2 friends who have promised to keep their phones near them at night in case I have to call and have them come stay with my kids. Of course that's not convenient for them at all - they've got their own kids. But I don't really have any other options. Mom won't be here until Monday.  It seems like the vast majority of my peers here in UT have many family members and relatives living nearby. Like a commune.  Easy to find someone to help in these situations. Not for me!  I have a lot of anxiety about who will care for my kids when I go into the hospital and how they'll do without me here for so long (24 hrs-ish).  I kindof hope I last til Monday so I know it's my MOM.
The birth plan:  Or rather, the "birth vision," or "birth preferences," as I've been advised to call it.  So the main goal is a VBAC. I do NOT want to be cut open again. [shuddering] Goal #2 would be an unmedicated birth.  Why? Simply because I believe a medicated birth won't lead to Goal #1.  That whole "cascade of interventions" was the cause of Brianna's cesarean birth, and then the twins were a scheduled C because that's what my HCP in Cedar felt comfy with. And there were no other HCPs in the area that would do anything different for me. Plus, I was still pretty uneducated with the whole birth process. That has definitely changed now! I've done so much more to prepare.  Not enough, of course. Never enough. But the BEST thing I've done is hired a DOULA. She's awesome, and she better help me get thru this. I also like my HCP - she's a Certified Nurse Midwife. So I get the whole midwifey care (where you're a client, not a patient - cuz this is a normal life process, not a disease) but I'm still in a hospital, which is the only place I'm comfortable giving birth at. My doula is also bringing along 2 apprentices, so it's going to be a party!
The post birth plan:  I keep wondering what life is going to be like with 4 kids ages 5 and under.  That sounds NUTS. I just pray this little girl is easy going. I'm going to try and keep life simple - not taking on extra "things" for a long time. Keeping my LLL stuff low maintenance, UtahRunning.com hours super low, and just focusing on keeping my little world in order.  I also will need to work hard to get this weight off - I've gained more during this pregnancy than the other 2!  37 with Brianna, 39 with the twins, and with this one - almost 50! Ack! Apparently calories still count while you're pregnant?! Dang it.  So that will take some focus to return to my normal wardrobe. I'm also a little anxious about breastfeeding. I hope she doesn't have any issues. Because I spend so much time working with moms who have various breastfeeding problems, I see how life-consuming it can be. Most problems are a result of mismanagement and are very preventable. But many are totally out of mom's control. Is it too much to ask to just have a perfectly normal, healthy, easy baby?!  :)

I would keep rambling on.... but contractions have been going on for the last couple hours, so I better do something about that....  :)